things I've learned through six months of service

1) Poverty is hard. I'm struggling with just under $900 a month. I can't imagine having a family while living off of that amount.
2) I love kids; I always have but I needed reminded of that.
3) Kids can do some really stupid things.
4) I've done some really stupid (probably event supider) things so it's pretty easy to forgive them.
5) Balancing full-time work with half-time schooling, fitness/wellness, household chores, and a social life is rough.
6) Friday nights are hard. I'm ready for bed by 9PM.
7) I can do anything I put my mind to. It may take me awhile to convince myself that I really can do it, but after I do, there's no stopping me.
8) I have some really great friends in Provo.
9) I have some really great friends in Pennsylvania and other parts of the world as well.
10) People are, uusally, very generous.
11) I need to make time to take care of myself or all balance will be lost.
12) I'm old now; I can't live off of 5 hours of sleep anymore. I get cranky.
13) You can get kids to do anything for candy.
14) Adults are still like kids in many ways - wanting instant gratification rather than waiting patiently for the better prize in the long run. Why save our money/points for an mp3 player when we can get 2 packs of markers now?
15) I'm going to be okay in the real world; I'm actually very marketable.
16) I am so not a gold person (organized, timely, lists) but I know how to use this fact to my advantage (i.e. I'm super flexible and won't stress out when something changes last minute; I can delegate tasks and I won't hesitate to do so)
17) Quite often, your health is worth sacrificing your social life.
18) It's true, not going to church and not studying the Word of God can lead to spiritual stagnation or spiritual death.
19) I write too much.
20) A list of 20 things is probably too long for you to read all 20. Bravo if you did.
21) Not all guys stop talking to you after you express interest that is not returned. Only dumb ones that aren't worth your time to begin with do that.

A Disciple's Journey

So, I'm amidst some spring cleaning/getting rid of stuff because I have too much of it, I stumbled upon an article entitled "A Disciple's Journey" by Elder Bruce. C. Hafen in an issue of BYU Magazine. It's a the Summer 2008 edition. (Don't judge me because I still had it nearly 3 years later - I used to make collages a lot). I'm pretty sure I held onto it because I wanted to read this article but just never got around to it.

I made myself read it today before it goes to the Boys & Girls Club to be used in their art projects. There was one paragraph that really stood out ot me.

"Satan may rattle us, but he cannot overcome us, for God can cast him from our presence. Lehi said 'It must needs be, that there is an oppostion in all things' (2 Nephi 2:11). So wherever you are on your journey, there will always be a reason not to go on. Don't wait until all obstacles disappear. The purely rational mind will always find a good reason to hold back, for Satan places those obstacles in our path. But opposition can strengthen us. The skills of human growth are best learned slowly agaisnt difficulty." (p. 29).

The applicaiton of this paragraph extends beyond the spirtual. One can apply this to weight-loss, school, marathon training.... It's just true. Don't wait until the obstacles are gone to move on. Ovecome the obstacles to become stronger for the bigger obstacles down the road.

I find my last post to be rather ironic. The day after I wrote that, one of my co-workers announced that she'll be leaving at the end of July.... I'm pretty set on applying for the job. Everyone is trying to convince me to move back but I'm not ready. There's still so much I want to accomplish on my own (far, far away) before I head back here.

home soon :)

I finally found my credit cards today...and my room is pretty stinkin' clean too.

I'm getting on a plane in 6 days to head home for Christmas. Soooo excited to be back for the first time since August. I have a feeling that after Christmas, I'll be pretty set on moving back in East in August. Three years has been a good chunk of time to spend in Utah. I'm excited to see where God is taking me (and who he will bring to me). Part of me wants to stay another year though. I looooove my job. Words can't begin to explain how much these kids make my day.

if you hid....

If you were to hide your credit cards from yourself (in order to help resist making a tempting purchase) where would you hide them? I hid them from myself a few weeks ago (when I was tempted to fly home for my birthday) and apparently hid them a little too well. I can't find them ANYWHERE!

In other news, my friend and I nearly died on the way back to Provo after our Thanksgiving weekend in Nevada. My car decided to go for a nice spin on the freeway (just missing the car beside me by inches). We ended facing south in the northbound lane. I kinda panicked (and swore) when I saw the headlights coming. It was a scary moment. When I tried to get my car turned around, it just slid off the right shoulder into the ditch like terrain. We were stuck there for about an hour until AAA was able to get a tow truck out there to tow us out. After we got out of harm's way, it was rather amusing. Especially when the car slid into the ditch and the GPS went "recalculating."

In other news, I think I just figured out how I'm going to just barely make all of my bill payments this month. As long as Sallie Mae really does have a grace period of 15 days, I'm going to be all right. I'll pay my rent and one loan payment tomorrow (for a total of $485) leaving me with $200. And then when I get paid again on the 15th, I'll fork over $500 to Sallie Mae, make my credit card payment, my other private student loan payment....leaving me with a whopping $30. It's scary, but it's getting done. :) Then my paycheck on the 30th will take care of rent and leave me with $59 to either "replenish" my savings or to put towards another bill. Oh geez, I didn't know what I was getting into when I signed up to be an AmeriCorps VISTA. Ooooh, and I just realized that none of this math includes tithing dangnabit.

early resolutions

I'm starting my resolutions now...why wait until the new year?

1. Start and follow a monthly budget - major goal: stop impulse spending i..e. such as the giant black Friday stuffed Eeyore that is currently sitting next to me
2. Pay off my car by the end of next year
3. Get back on track with marathon and weight training
4. Start being a health nut again (I might not have had as much fun but I felt better when I was a health nut)

distant summer

This past summer, and the people from it, seem so distant. It's so weird to think that I spent so much time talking to someone and now I almost feel like that person never even existed in my life. Crazy how things work. Sometimes, I think that friendship is like learning a language. You invest so much time studying it, getting to know its personality, so to say. You don't wait until you completely know it to put it to pratice. You become fluent by practicing. Once you stop practicing and using the langauge, you start to lose it.

Friendships must be continually cultivated...otherwise, it turns into a mere acquintance.



I have a lot to write about, but this is what's on my mind right now.