So, I told off my trainer last week...okay, I didn't really tell him off, but I got sternly defensive. The conversation started with his remark about my bracelets from Victor that I always wear. He muttered something and rolled his eyes. The conversation went something like this:
Me: "What?"
Trainer: "Nothing, I just think you can do so much better"
Me: "It's not about doing better. It's about how I feel. Besides, where's better?"
Trainer: "Well, give it a few more weeks, then you'll have guys calling you" (in regards to weight loss)
Me: slightly pissed off "What? If losing weight is what it takes and I have to be 'this big' to get phone calls, I don't want anything to do with it. I want someone who is interested in me, not just the way I look. Victor likes me for me...for how I am already. I don't need to change."
Trainer: "It's all about how the game is played."
Me: my voice got progressively louder by this point "I don't want games. I'm tired of games"
I'm kinda annoyed (still) but more so, disappointed. I hate that point when I realize that someone is, indeed, just another typical guy. I'm so thankful for Victor. I know it seems odd to say since he's sitting in prison right now, but he's my knight in shining armor. Other than a bad past, he has or is developing, the key characteristics of someone compatible with me. Someone who smothers me with attention (but in a non-clingy way), patience, beyond brilliant intelligence (okay, except for common sense...he lacked some of that in the past), stupidly romantic, poetic, cheesy, positive, charming, and the list could go on. Oh, how I wish he could be here with me right now.
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