Saturday, November 1, 2008

proposition 8

Well, I've put off putting my thoughts about Proposition 8 in writing. With only 3 days remaining before the election, I've decided that I need to do this. I'm not an excellent writing when it comes to my thoughts and politics but I'll do my best. I can only hope that this isn't stumbled upon by members of the general public who disagree and are very ardent about expressing their disagreement. The last thing I want is for this to be turned into a bashing ground. I am open to responses and different beliefs and ideas but I hate it when people start bashing those they disagree with. Namecalling was supposed to send with elementary school ;) (Apparently, a good chunk of politicians didn't pick that up).

A brief overview of my problems with Proposition 8:
a) it's brought about by the fear
b) it's discriminatory
c) it forces "Christian" values on those who don't necessary believe in the Christian faith.
d) homosexuality is an innate characteristic--not merely a choice

  • Mormons were forced out of their homes by violent mobs as they traveled farther and farther west across the United States in order to escape. "Christians" burned their houses and holy places of worship to the ground.
  • It took until 1968 for the Supreme Court to declare all forms of racial segregation as unconstitutional
  • Some people, even today in 2008, are afraid to elect a black man as President of the United States.
  • Many of my friends give me a hard time about belonging to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
  • Japanese Americans were placed in internment camps after the bombing of Pearl Harbor
  • Women didn't have the right to vote until 1920.
  • Homosexual couples not having the right to marry.
What do all of these items have in common??? FEAR!!! People are afraid of those who are different than themselves as well as the unknown. Yes, homosexuals are different but that doesn't make them any less of a U.S. citizen. Refusing to give them the same rights as a heterosexual couple is a discriminatory action resulting from fear. People complain that kids will be taught about homosexual couples as though they are normal families. I personally think it's better for the children to learn about them now than to be confused later--parents can reinforce their personal values at home.

One of the biggest arguments against same-gender marriages is the moral one that the biblical description of marriage being between a man and a woman--homosexuality is a sin. And while I personally don't necessarily believe that same-gender attraction is morally right, I'm not going to push my beliefs on others. This is the United States. Not everyone belongs to a Christian faith. I don't think that recognizing same-gender marriages is going to physically harm anyone else...so why make such a big deal out of it? There are more important things to worry about (such as California's Proposition 4--that would require parental notification of minors seeking abortions). The Christian Right has often assumed that the right is the only right. If we're so worried about the definition of marriage, let's make it equal for everyone and have the government only recognize civil unions. Keep the term "marriage" as a religious term between the church and the couple. The government would no longer be discriminating against same-sex couples.

Additionally, one of the emphases of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has been that acting on homosexuality is a choice (which, yeah, I guess it is) but many others go so far as to claim that being homosexual is a choice. I don't believe that it is a choice. I believe that is an innate characteristic--they're wired slightly differently. Not recognizing this is a denial of one's true self and can lead to depression and other emotional problems. (I've witnessed this denial in action and life has been much better since this person decided to quit denying it). I believe in being true to oneself.

This issue is so personal to me because of my dad. I love my dad, I support my dad (even if I don't always agree). I don't think it's the government's place to decide whether my dad can marry his partner or not. I'd like to leave you with the e-mail I received from my dad today. It's what made me realize that I need to sit down and write what I think instead of just letting it pass by.


"I was watching the ABC national news with Charlie Gibson last evening and
saw this, "the Mormon Church has contributed the most to the 'Vote Yes on
Prop 8' Campaign in California." I don't know where they got their
information but thought that I would share it with you. On the other side,
Ellen Degenerous has contributed the most to vote no to prop 8. She recently
married her partner.

I honestly don't know which rights would be effected if prop 8 passes in
addition to the right to marry. The main issue is that gay and lesbian
couples are tired of being considered second class citizens. All European
countries and Canada recognize gay/lesbian couples and can marry. The United
States is suppose to be the "free-est" country in the world yet, we are so
far behind the real world.

I can tell you this. There are over 1000 rights that married heterosexual
couples have that are recognized by the federal government, whereas Bill & I
do not have access to because Pennsylvania and the federal government does
not recognize our relationship. These rights range from filing taxes
together, inheritance forgiveness, hospital visits, to decisions about
death. Even if we traveled to Massachusetts or California and got married
there, nothing would be recognized by the government.

Now that we finally have the home of our dreams, we would like to have a
ceremony next summer at our home for family and friends to share our love
for each other. This would be considered our official recognition. And when
the time arises for the government to recognize our relation, we will do
what we need to do."

He then continued to inform me of certain agreements he and Bill have so that I would be aware of his wishes if something were to happen to him and the government wouldn't allow Bill to speak for him.


Well, I did it. It wasn't the most clearly nor concisely expressed but now you know my thoughts on Proposition 8....

3 comments:

Megan said...

Sorry that I have not posted in awhile. For a period of time, my Internet here at the house was not working. However, that is fixed now and I am going to try to work on a post. I miss you. -Megan

Anonymous said...

I thought it was very well written. You got your point across! and I def. am on the same page as you :) Which is good b/c I don't know how to express my thoughts in words and this basically did it for me, lol

- Becky

Preethi said...

Thanks so much for sharing your kind and sincere thoughts, Malinda. I am totally on the politicians-should-remember-kindergarten-rules bus. :)

I agree with a lot of what you said, but have a few opposing thoughts that I'll try to keep as open and non-antagonistic as you did! I want to make it clear that I would not be opposed to civil unions allowing all the rights that your dad describes.

I completely agree that we have no business pushing our opinions on those who are not of our faith. I think where we differ is in that I do believe allowing marriage between homosexual couples does, in fact, affect parties outside of those being married. I believe it affects children, and it is the government's responsibility to ensure they are brought up in the best way possible for society. What worries me most, perhaps, is that defining marriage (as opposed to just civil unions) between homosexual couples as legal could very easily force all churches, as well, to recognize it and to perform it - which could force the church to perform homosexual marriages in temples. I'm pretty sure they would stop performing temple marriages first, which would be very sad.

Anyway, just a few brief thoughts. Again, I appreciate your care and sincerity. :)